BSM: Reflections at Sunrise

Tracy at Mother May I is reflecting on things for Best Shot Monday this week, so I took cues from her and composed my own list of current reflections.

Just returned from my last hurrah of the summer, as I start back to work / school this week on Thursday (yikes!!), so most of my pondering happened in the face of this glorious place- the crashing waves, the sucking wet sand, the delirious laughter of children playing in the nearby pool...what a place to reflect! This is Daytona Beach, Florida...my best shot above is at sunrise on our last morning after spending a week there.

While there, I reflected upon the following:

* going back to work this week- trying to gear myself up for a less stressful year...hoping and praying that all will go well with new administration and new students...I took deep breaths while trying to soak in this sea thinking that would rid me of all of my worries...

* my parents- growing older and more fragile- my father celebrated his 70th birthday while we were at the beach...70 years old. That sounds so old...they are such active and busy people that they do not act like that age, so it is easy for me to forget...I already ache for the day that I will have let go of them...*sigh*I can not even think that thought all the way through...but I have just in the last few years really realized the years in them...the photo below is my father with his two grandgirls- my daughter (the oldest grand child) on the right and MEB, my brother's daughter (the youngest grand child) on the left.

* how fast children grow up- the daughter just turned 19 this summer, and we were all talking about how she would be 20 years old this time next summer...(*oh, my heart*) During this conversation, all of a sudden the daughter realized that MEB will soon be 6 (in November), will start kindergarten in a week or so, and will be almost 7 this time next summer...(boy was that shocking for her!) I told her that is what it has been like for me to watch her grow so very fast before my eyes...that is one little girl that the daughter simply adores...it is so nice for the cousins to be so close; when the daughter is around, MEB will not have much to do with the rest of us...it is really quite touching, and I hope MEB will still love the daughter that much even when she gets older and older...The photos below are from MEB's first slumber party! My brother, sister-in-law, and their kids were in Daytona with us (we stayed in different sides of the resort), and MEB got it into her head that she was going to spend the night with us...so the daughter planned a slumber party with dinner, games, painting nails, make-up, pop-corn, late night television (Disney Channel), and much much snuggling...it was so sweet!

MEB is wearing my shoes in the first shot...a sure sign of growing up- wearing heels! Nana (my mother) was our nail tech for the evening in the next shots...she was so gracious in applying polish to everyone's fingernails and toenails...with such skill and no complaints! And of course, MEB wanted to sleep in the daughter's bed...

* lastly, I reflected upon the future- right now there are many uncertainties for us- financial difficulties, the daughter's college / job (or lack there of), where life will take us throughout the next several months...I continued to take deep breaths and realized that God is in control of it all, and I need to trust in Him...I took this last photo as a sign that all will be well! (not sure if you can see the rainbow, but it is there...His promise.)

Check out other stories and photos of reflections for this week here. Hope you have a great week!

Two for Tuesday

One:
Ok, so I missed BSM...how did that happen? I am on summer break, and while this is the most luxuriously lazy time of my life, I sort of lose all track of days...I am fully aware that it is 2008, but I can't easily recall what day of what month it is...I did realize that it is July (mostly thanks to the 4th of July celebrations), but I completely missed Monday. Yesterday was kind of a blur to me...so here is what I would have posted on Monday!

BLUEBERRIES...it was blueberry picking time on Friday morning. My friend, Natalie, invited us to tag along with her and several of her friends to a nearby blueberry field. So many little ones and their moms...the daughter and I enjoyed the frenzy of it all...lost buckets, toddlers picking up blueberries off of the ground, and eating handfuls rather than putting them in the bucket...I laughed so much....We had such a nice time.

This is a bad picture of the husband's dessert last night...the daughter made a delicious chicken stir fry with Thai rice for dinner, and I made a light cream to go with these luscious berries. I have also found several not-so-good-for-you blueberry recipes that I will try over the next several months with the blueberries I put in the freezer. For this week's Best Shot Monday, Tracey talked about the "earth's currency" and I think these blueberries are exactly that...for more BSM photos and stories check out her place.

Two:
Another wonderfully fun thing that we did recently...a day of swimming and several games of Candy Land afterwards. How long has it been since you have played this game? Well, for me, since I have a nineteen-year-old, it has been quite a while! Of course, I remembered how to play; it is so simple, but things on the board game have changed a bit. There are bridges and people that I did not recognize...including the King and the Candy Man. What fun. MEB is such a delight, and is totally in love with playing games. She is also very good at most of them...she wins more often than not. Oh, how I love this little girl. You can read more about her here and here. And even here. She makes my heart sing... I love that my parents keep her, especially during the summer, since I get to see her more often. She will start kindergarten in the fall...and most likely will not need to go back to Nana and Papa's house to be kept since school is all day. We are all struggling with that...her growing up and not being a baby anymore. *sigh*
So, I will enjoy many more games of Candy Land and Monopoly Junior while I can!

No BSM: Camera Missing in Action

The daughter is away...with my camera. All of my weekend photos are still on the camera, so I have no shots to post for today. *sigh*

Oh well, just as an update...
I found a book with which to busy myself over the last day or so...
The 4th of July weekend was lovely- swimming and eating dinner at my parents...
Another cookout at a cousin's house with many, many of the other cousins that I so rarely see.
Time with my husband, as he had several days off in a row. That almost NEVER happens, so I was giddy with snuggling and early bed times...(that totally helps my insomnia!)

Speaking of bed times, I just wanted to let you know that I was off of the couch...
I am headed to bed, but I will post some photos when the camera comes in from life on the road with a crazy teenage girl.

Hope your week is wonderful...
Check out the really great Best Shot Monday photos and stories at Melody's place- Slurping Life!

BSM: A Letter to my Niece

Dear MEB,

You are getting older, so fast I can hardly believe it. I am so happy that you still find wonder in the world, that you are not scared to be yourself, that you march to your very own beat...

You make me smile with your laughter....the way your sweet nose crinkles up, while your eyes practically squeeze shut, and your laughs come out in precious tiny gasps. When you wrap your little arms around me, I want to stop time to savor the seconds of your youth.

As I look at you this summer, and think of summers past, I am amazed at your fearlessness in the water- swimming without any floats, jumping off of the diving board, and swimming the full length of the pool by yourself. I am shocked by the length of your legs- so long and lovely, ready to carry you away into the world. You make my head spin with all the wonderful things that you know...the questions you think to ask...the answers you seek...I am knocked out a thousand times over listening to you read your favorite book.

When you start school this fall, a whole new world will open up to you...there will be things you already know, but also much, much more that you don't. Won't it be fun to make new friends, learn something new each and every day, and discover a brand new place? I will be excited to hear about all of the fabulous fun things you do each day!

I hope you realize, dear one, how very much you are loved...from the first moment I ever held you in my arms, my heart was swollen with love...and now these days, I am near bursting!

I love you, sweet girl.

Your Andi

For more Best Shot Monday photos and stories, head over to Melody's this week!

BSM: This is Summer

" Out of the Sea Endlessly"

Ode to Walt Whitman

There are some things too big to fit on paper.

What if words could describe the ripples of the sea?

And if there were words, what would call us to it?

The heartbeat of the sea,

rocking, spilling its secrets onto the shore.

The ocean's pent up emotions pour out in the surge-

the surge, the surge, the "procreant urge..."

We are drawn to the erratic "convulsive breaths" of the sea

the swollen moon above

the gulls mourning their losses

the sucking sand pulling us in

as the sea whispers.

July 2007

I wrote this poem last summer as part of a poetry class for my master's degree. I try to describe in mere words why I love the sea so much...there really aren't words.

This photo is from this last week at the beach...when I look at it, I can hear the sounds, smell the surf, and feel the sucking of the sand...this is summer to me.

Keep reading below to find out more about the sights and sounds of this trip.

Also, check out more summertime shots for BSM.

Images of Summer Fun- This is Vacation

We just returned from a week at the beach...Myrtle Beach, South Carolina. We had a wonderful time-resting, relaxing, summering away our time in a lovely place! This is me with my father and the daughter... (I am HATING my Sandra Dee hair...it is courtesy of the sun, the wind, the sweat, and my inability to stop tucking it behind my ears!)
















This is our view from the 9th floor balcony... it also shows our path to the beach. We take the wooden deck and the steps all the way down to the sand. Not too far, and such a view!
















The daughter and my most FAVORITE cousin, H. sipping a delicious tropical drink on the beach...H. was our bartender for the week, and I must confess, we all spent a great deal of time sipping delicious concoctions!















Typically on beach trips, my father and I get up each morning before the sunrise to walk several miles down the beach...this is a tradition for us. Every time we visit a beach (at least twice a year) we do this together...daddy calls it "our time." This tradition is one of the things I treasure most about our trips. This is time for the two of us to talk, discuss hard things, remember good times, or just walk in silence listening to the waves crash...priceless time. This year, H joined us. We had just as many wonderful and funny conversations! It is just such a nice time on the beach before the day really begins...
This photo, however, was taken on one of our afternoon walks- just before a storm came. H. and I were skipping over some water, trying not to get our feet wet, as the daughter captured this silly shot. I love the sky here; you can see the storm brewing!

















This is my sweet mother doing what she enjoys best- reading! Of course, I was on the love seat nearby doing something that I enjoy too- reading also! I just looked over at her, and the sight was so precious to me that I just HAD to snap this shot. Although, in a few short moments, I looked over again ,and THIS is what I saw:














LOL! I am not kidding- there is like five minutes between shots! When I showed them to her later, she laughed and said, "I could not keep my eyes open...I just needed a short little nap!" Two activities that my mother and I both enjoy-reading and napping!






















This is the daughter on our night to cook. We traveled this year with my parents, my Aunt P, and my cousin H. (my husband and H's other half had to stay home and work) Other than the evenings we go out to eat, we each take a night to make dinner. The daughter was head chef and I was her sous-chef! We decided to make beer battered shrimp and chicken (since I do not eat shrimp). A nice summer salad was the perfect accompaniment to the heavier fried foods. Everyone said her meal was better than any we'd eaten so far. Watch out Food Network, we may just have another famous chef in our midst! (By the way, it TOTALLY cracks me up that she is wearing a field day t-shirt from her 6th grade year in elementary school.)

















This is my plate piled high with yummy things! I ate chicken, but the salad is my favorite- with mandarin oranges, strawberries, toasted almonds, and poppy seed dressing. DELICIOUS!
















An interesting ending to our trip this year included a visit to a local gay bar called Rainbow House to see a drag show on our last night. (H. and his other half B. have visited this bar before.) This is after a few drinks, as you can tell.















This is H. with a lovely lady from the show...This was a first for me, but we had a blast!
















Our last morning on the beach...the daughter and I took a sneak peek one last time, while everyone was inside checking the drawers, cabinets, and closets to be sure we had gotten everything packed up. We needed one last glimpse of the wonderful sea...

BSM: Parenting Imperfections

Parenting imperfections???
How much time do you have? I have been a parent for some years now (19!), and I have had countless moments of imperfection....too many to confess in just one simple post! Evidently, I REALLY need to tune in to the blog series that Tracey mentioned- Brene Brown's The Gift of Imperfect Parenting. I have never before thought of my imperfections as a gift. What I hope this series does for me is confirm that most mothers do in fact struggle with the uncertainty of what we are doing...I hope that I am not alone in my worries. I am the mother of a head strong, lost, and struggling nineteen year old daughter, and I OFTEN HAVE NO CLUE WHAT I AM DOING AS A PARENT!!! Some days, I want to stand on the roof tops and yell, "HELP!!!" I know I have made mistakes, errors in judgment, and had some of the worst imperfect moments...I am certainly planning to tune in later today. I may even purchase the CD! I am certain that this is something I will need to revisit- LOL! All in all, I hope to learn something that will benefit me as a mother.



The picture I chose as my best shot is one from a series of shots that I took awhile ago for a class when I was getting my master's degree. It is symbolic of many of the struggles I have had as a parent of a teenager in today's society...she is faced almost daily with access to drugs, alcohol, and sex, you name it...these issues are present in the lives of our children, even when we think they are not. Many of these things blindsided me as a mother. Even though (I confess) I was a rowdy teenager myself, it was a completely different world then. It is worse now. I continue to hope that better days will come for our youth- that we as a society will recognize our shortcomings as parents and community members, and stand up for what our children need. May God bless all of you that are newly starting on your journey as parents...I pray your years are a piece of cake!!
For more Best Shot Monday photos, take some time to visit Mother May I.

BSM: Perfect Party Post

What is it???? Something special arrived for the party in an absolutely adorable box...
It's a cake! I could not have asked for anything better...THE most expensive birthday cake that I have ever bought, but it was well worth it to see the look on my baby girl's face...
Dinner, friends, family, good food, love and laughter...the celebration is underway!
Oh, the gifts...MEB helps unwrapping big surprises... just what she wanted!
Cousins...this sweet little girl LOVES the birthday girl with her whole heart!

Perfection...

Nineteen years ago, on this very day, she came into my life. I was uncertain, much too young, and scared out of my mind...but when I took that little bundle into my arms, and she peered at me with such love, my heart melted immediately. She had the most exotic brown eyes, a little button nose, and a perfect red bow mouth. She was perfection in the truest form...THE most amazing gift that I have ever received...I am blessed to spend my life loving and taking care of this angel. I have been blessed every day since then.

Motherhood is so unpredictable...I have often felt the same uncertainty that I felt on the day of her birth...a cloud that hovers over me, causing me to worry that something I did would become the biggest mistake in her life...that I would mess up, and make her life miserable, or just be an altogether terrible parent. Even this is a blessing...so many wish to be mothers and are unable.

She is the joy of my life, and no matter what challenges lie ahead, I will always be proud of her...I will always be thankful that I am her mother.

Happy 19th birthday, my baby girl!

By the way, the party was perfection, as well! We had such a nice time...

Menu for the evening:

Baked ziti (made with Disney princess pasta, ground beef, cheese, and tomato sauce)

Garden salad (with Green Jacket salad dressing, tomotoes, croutons)

Cheesy garlic bread

Tea, lemonade, sodas

Princess cake with ice cream for dessert

Gifts for the birthday girl:

The Food Network's 4 in 1 Panini Grill

A deep fryer

Batter bowl, spatulas, pancake turner, and other cooking utensils

Sensational Summer Grilling recipe book

Perfume

Money

Note: My girl is interested in cooking, and she's become addicted to watching The Food Network. So, these gifts were a bit selfish, sort of...it would be nice, oh so nice, to have company in the kitchen and help with food preparation!

Party Favor Bags:

Precious princess purses filled with Dinsey princess colored pencils and stickers, candy, party blowers, and mini Uno card games.

After dinner, cake, ice cream and gifts, the girls played several rounds of Uno (with the teeny tiny cards), watched part of Aladdin, and then decided to go for a midnight swim at my parent's pool.

*sigh*

I can not tell you what a wonderfully fulfilling evening this has been- despite my teary-eyed feeling of having a daughter who is 19, I LOVE knowing that she and her friends can still be little girls once in awhile, play silly games, get excited about Disney princesses, and find the wonder in the world from the perspective of little girls.

Hope your weekend brought you much happiness and some perfect moments as well!

Check out more Best Shot Monday posts here.

BSM: Memorial Day Moments

The pool is officially open. The flower pots and flower beds are planted; the fountains are flowing again. The deck is swept clean, and the tables don new umbrellas dressed in this season's finery...For years, we have gathered our belongings and headed to this place, an oasis for the world weary, the pool at my parent's home...this is THE place where we vacationed when I was young. Who needed Florida, when you could simply walk out to the back deck and take the most refreshing plunge into the crystal clear waters of this lovely pool? This is the place where I feel most comfortable in the least flattering of clothing, my bathing suit. This is where my child (now almost 19) took her first naps when she was only days old...where she first learned to swim, to dive, and sunbathe...where countless children have learned to love the water without fear. This is where sunscreen, floats, snuggly beach towels, pool toys, flip flops, books of every genre, and sometimes tropical drinks are to be found each and every day of the summer. This day marks our first swim of the season...we have all emerged like flowers reaching for and following the sun. We have gathered together once again, with the hopes of more family fun and wonderful moments in this, our sacred place. The scent of the nearby grill effortlessly searing the tender morsels of meat is always making our mouths water for what wonders will soon come...while we wait, we float, we dive; we enter beneath the surface of the water, hoping to escape the troubles of what lies above us...letting it all slip away for just a moment...aaahhhh, the first day of our official summer. Hope your holiday brought you wonderful times with family and friends. For more wonderment and lovely places, check out everyone elses' Best Shot Monday.

BSM: Honoring Girl Power

This is MEB again, my niece, the girliest girl you will ever meet...at 5 years old, she gets her nails done at the salon with her mom...she LOVES baby dolls...she dresses up like a princess whenever she gets the chance...she takes dance every Tuesday evening...her favorite color is PINK...she sings along with Hannah Montana just as loud as all of the other girls...BUT she totally rocks the T-ball field! She swings a bat as powerful as any boy; she takes the bases as fast as she can, and she gets down and dirty with the rest of the team!
This evening, I had the honor of attending MEB's last game of the season. Her team completely nailed it with a score of 28-11. I was so proud and touched to see this sweaty, serious side of her. Then, I thought...that is the mystery of GIRLS! We CAN have it both ways! We can do ANYTHING! Today, I am honoring the girly tomboy in ALL of us. Hope you have a GREAT week doing something that you love.
To check out what everyone else is honoring, take a look at other lovely shots at Mother May I?!

P.S. Like Tracey's my shot is borrowed. A team dad / photographer took it, and I am borrowing it since all of the photos that I took this evening were so awful. Maybe one day, I will have a decent camera!

BSM: Sunshine

Lucky enough to capture a bit of sunshine in your life lately? Tracey's post for Best Shot Monday this week made me focus on the sunshine in my life right now...

the daughter when her heart sings, and her little bow mouth turns up into an real smile

a nuzzle from a cat after a long hard day

a phone call from the best friend in the whole wide world asking to spend time with me

watching a newborn baby sleep and dream

snuggling the husband on our couch while watching a movie

the smell of freshly made coffee

my favorite songs drifting into my ears from headphones, enveloping me

a walk in a nearby park, wading in the water

soaking up the rays of the sun on a spring afternoon

buying some new clothes for spring

the taste of berry key lime cheesecake-sharing it with someone you love

the sight of people emerging from winter's cocoon, enjoying the spring

laughter, loud and silly, from girls you love
newly painted toe nails and bare feet walking through the fresh grass

Here's hoping you have quite a bit of sunshine in your life right now too! Enjoy your week.

BSM: "Live in the Sunshine..."

"Live in the sunshine, swim in the sea, and drink the wild air..."- Emerson

Today, I would like to share one of my favorite places on EARTH! I recently spent the day there with my best friend in the whole wide world while we were on spring break. If you have never been, and you get the chance to go, DO NOT MISS IT! If I had millions of dollars to spend on anything I wanted, I would quit my job, purchase a house here, and open a shop in the square....this is my most wonderful fantasy! (Some days are tough enough that this fantasy is ALL that gets me through to the next day...)



Just take a glimpse of ONE part of this fabulous place:

This is Seaside, Florida. I can not even begin to tell you how amazing this place is...how lovely, how quaint and perfect. I am sure it is just like the rest of the world (less than perfect, complete with disappointments) but in my head, it is PERFECTION! Check out this site if you are curious about the beginning of this town; it was built with purpose and with luxurious simplicity in mind. Everything about this town relates to the "Seaside style." My most favorite stops besides the actual beach are Pickles Beachside Grill for lunch (the BEST fried pickles!), Perspicasity (a Mediterranean open-air market), Sundog Books and Central Square Records (GREAT books, neatly arranged downstairs, while the ecclectic musical finds are upstairs), and last but not least, Modica Market (a charming little grocery store with the most unusual gourmet finds). There are loads more, but these are just my favorites.

(Note: By the way, the film The Truman Show was filmed here. If you see the film before or after visiting, you will notice so many lovely aspects of the town...it is so neat to see this lovely place in that strange film!)

For BSM, I chose to share a few photos that I took recently from Perspicasity, Modica Market, and surrounding areas...I know, there is more than ONE, but I so adore this place.

FABULOUS Emerson quote and
my very favorite concept:

"shop barefoot by the sea."

They sell clothes, shoes, jewelry, odd

and eccentric things...

Lovely open displays, baskets,

such great finds!

Modica Market

Bike rentals

Thanks for going on that mini-vacation in my mind with me...I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did! Please stop over at Tracey's to see what other friendly faces and new places people are sharing today!

(Note: I hope you will also take time to read about what a GREAT weekend we had...today's theme worked for that too, but I had already told you all about it!)

BSM: Can You Handle These Truths?

The truth is I am always in too much of a rush to take such an early morning photo.

The truth is I am not certain that I am brave enough to share the above mentioned photo with the world, or honestly even the few people who stop by this blog from time to time.

The truth is I really am more of a morning person, though lately I can NOT seem to rise from my bed as early as I need to in order not to rush every morning.

The truth is I wish I could take a nap every day. (I LOVE to sleep. It could almost count as an illness!)

The truth is I often sleep with the husband and AT LEAST four of our five cats in our bed.

The truth is my pajamas are my most favorite clothes in the world...(baggy, flannel bottoms and any random t-shirt.)

The truth is I just started back to work TODAY after a week of spring break, and I felt depressed and comatose all day.

The truth is I wish summer would start tomorrow, and I did not have to go back to work until August. (This is my LEAST favorite time of year- state mandated standardized testing soon, and then hormonal chaos until we call it officially over for the year around the end of May)

The truth is right now this very minute, I wish I were back on the BEACH with my very best friend in the whole wide world...

If you can handle more truthiness, wander over to

Mother May I and have a look!

BSM: A Day Early

Note: I am off with my best friend in the whole wide world on our annual spring break excursion (We are heading to Destin, Florida first thing Monday morning), so I am technically posting late Sunday evening...(almost my best shot Monday!)

Easter is such a colorful and vibrant celebration of New Life...and I can not resist little girls in their Sunday best. This is my precious neice, my heart, MEB (pronounced like mee-bee; this is what my mother calls her). She is five, and she steals my heart each and every time I am near her. She does live in the same town as I do, but we are all so busy that I do not spend as much time with her as I would like. I was thrilled that I was able to see her today at my parent's house, as we all gathered there for the traditional family egg hunt and dinner. She makes me laugh; she makes my heart sing, and I am convinced that she will grow up to do something COMPLETELY amazing when she gets big! Just look at those sweet, chubby toes...that is the only thing on her that still says 'baby' to me. Everything else speaks 'big girl' all the way!

Today, the family egg hunt was HILARIOUS, at best! My nephews, MEB's much older brothers, gave her a great competition. (Keep in mind that the oldest is 16, the middle brother is 12, and as I said, she is 5!) They hunted eggs SO FAST that I could barely snap photos, and she managed to keep up with them so well. (By the way, the daughter, at 18, has finally graduated up to helping hide the eggs!LOL) The final score was 31 eggs (16 year old) to 27 eggs (5 year old) to 17 eggs (12 year old). Yes, with this lot EVERYTHING is a competition!

And they are off..."Don't let her knock you down!"




















B wants a recount..."How could I have only gotten 17 eggs???"

And the winner is...."No one can compete with the master-egg-finder!!!"

Here's hoping that you had just as much fun with your family this Easter...hoping your weather was perfect and that you were able to laugh, love and celebrate this wonderful life that we are So blessed to live! For more BSM, check out what Tracey has in store for you on Monday!

(OK...have a wonderful week! I will return refreshed and ready to once again face the world after some much needed best friend therapy and some girls-week-out adventure!)